Don’t Blink

Summer 2015 has slowly approached its end. Tomorrow morning we’ll all be waking up to another, and hopefully better school year.

Speaking on my behalf, this summer felt like a never ending year. It had its great moments, but it definitely held some of my worst ones too. I never thought much of how fast it would go, and how not to take it for granted.

That was until I woke up this morning and realized I’m going to be a junior, tomorrow.

That year includes:

Turning 17. Taking the ACT. Applying for colleges. New high school drama. Old high school drama. New classes. New friends. New memories.

It’s a lot of news, and a lot of changes, just like each year before. The only difference is that this year relates, and hopefully is one of the most beneficial years to my future.

I’m really nervous, and really excited. I’m also hoping for a lot of change in all areas listed above. Change sounds appealing to me, and I’ve really never been able to say that before.

But I would say the scariest part of it all is, growing up.

As stupid as this sounds, yesterday, my mom brought in one of my old stuffed animals. I got rid of almost all of mine last year without thinking of any value in them. She handed me this big, cute, and furry lion when I was least expecting it. I’m going to embarrassingly admit that I started to tear up. I’m generally not emotional about these types of things, but this time it hit me.

Only so many years ago, that was what I wanted. A big, cute, and furry stuffed lion. Something to play with, and something to cuddle with at night.

I will also embarrassingly admit, 16 year old me sat the lion on my bed and held it in my arms as I slept last night. And ya know what? I liked it.

It reminded me of something I needed to feel again. An easy, hopeful childhood.

There’s perks of growing up, of course. I love being older, and being treated with actual respect. Being able to chime into actual conversations, and see R rated movies are nice too. But sometimes, it’s sad when I reminisce to my childhood. Honestly, it’s even sad to reminisce back to my freshman year. That’s how much things have changed in a 2 year time period.
God, if I only knew how fast that time would go by.

Just like this summer, day by day the time went slow. Looking back at it on my last day, it was a blink of an eye.

I’m 16, and right now, I would do anything to just be 8 again.



the sixteen year old girl who misses her stuffed lion

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